The Communication Illusion

The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place, how sure are you that the other person has understood what you really wanted to say. Or is it that the other person has only heard and now it’s up to him/her to interpret further.

You would have come across few conversations where the listener and teller are on the same page, every word said and heard has been understood in the right context, this happens when the trust is high, usually communication is easy, instant, and effective when people involved in the conversation trust each other, they will listen what is been said and the mind interprets it in the right way, when people lack trust the mind start reading between lines and misinterpreting and as the trust factors goes down the communication barrier increases.

I have often come across another situation, especially happen when the team is close knit, understands each other very well, trust factor is very high and in such cases there is an assumption factor which plays a havoc, team is aware about the strategy but is disconnected due to an assumption that each of the team member knows it and not required to be explicitly discussed. Planning and Communication are two wheels of the same bike… both go hand in hand and good planning comes with good communication… how many times when the trust factor is high do we ask questions… or probe further

Let me illustrate this with an example, one of my communication trainers did quote this during our training … importance of planning and communication … this is a real incident that occurred with students of IIT Mumbai Batch of 1992.

One Night 4 college students were playing till late night and could not study for the test which was scheduled for the next day.

In the morning they thought of a plan. They made themselves look as dirty with grease and dirt. They then went up to the Dean and said that they had gone out to a wedding last night and on their return the tire of their car burst and they had to push the car all the way back and that they were in no condition to appear for the test.

So the Dean said they could have the re-test after 3 days. They thanked him and said they would be ready by that time. On the third day they appeared before the Dean.. The Dean said that as this was a Special Condition Test, all four were required to sit in separate classrooms for the test... They all agreed as they had prepared well in the last 3 days.

The Test consisted of 2 questions with a total of 100 Marks.

Q.1. Your Name............................ (2 MARKS)

Q.2. which tire burst? (98 MARKS)
a) Front Left
b) Front Right
c) Back Left
d) Back Right.....!!!